23 days

Eat, drink and be scary. ~Author Unknown

Tonight I am post-dating my blog by just over an hour . . . almost missed the 23rd day of the countdown, but technically my day is not over so I am getting this in right under the
wire.

I spent the evening at a Halloween party as Cruella DeVille.

The party was full of the usual suspects, with a few new faces mixed in. One new cute, nice boy in particular, but I am such a social mess when it comes to the whole single, flirt, meet and mingle thing, that of course I couldn’t get the courage (and no liquid courage as a back-up, I was a DD tonight) to try and swap numbers.

It seems the longer I go without a date or catching the interest of anyone, the more it chips away at my self-confidence. I begin to feel fat, unsuccessful, uninteresting and completely unattractive and I seriously question if I will ever date anyone ever again.

Of course I know how ridiculous all of the above is, but I think every girl always has that nagging low self-esteem bug in the back of her head. Right now, mine feels like it’s getting validation and it’s making me feel like I am in a pretty dark place. However, I am working ever so hard to find the light switch. Especially for the readers’ sakes, since I know my blogs haven’t been the most uplifting lately . . . and we still have 22 more in a row to weather :).

Anyway, it’s actually almost 2:00 AM now and I have to be at work tomorrow morning at 8:00 AM. Yes, on a Sunday. At least I will only be a little sleep deprived and won’t have a hang-over to nurse!

Comments

  1. I would rather have your blog be really how you’re feeling and not glossing things over for the sake of your readers. I think most people realize that not everyone’s life is always hunky-dory and it’s okay to reflect that in your blog. I know when I “vent” in my blog it makes me feel better, until I get nasty emails from people, but for the most part, people are understanding and supportive. Oh, and I’m married and I still have those same feelings you do sometimes so you’re not alone. I hope those guys in Denver take off the blinders soon and realize how fantastic you are! =)

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