my sales experiment.

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You see those statistics? That right there, my friend, is why I am a terrible, terrible salesperson.


Not going to lie. My interest in my little car sales experiment is waning. I was doing it because it was fun. And it was. But, it’s slowly becoming not fun.

Maintaining a sales pipeline is not for the faint of heart. Especially when you’re not really motivated to maintain said sales pipeline.

It’s not fun calling and emailing someone 8,000 times when 9 times out of 10 they have no intent on buying a car from you. Often you get rude email responses that make you feel like a smarmy sleaze ball when you’ve done nothing wrong, just performed your job. And in training they will tell you all of the time not to form judgements on whether or not someone is truly a serious buyer and assume everyone is – but no. I just don’t have the relentlessness to beat someone down to come to me for a car. Perhaps because the way I shop, I want to be left alone. When I am ready to buy and I want someone to help me . . . I will ask. I approach my sales the same way and it’s obviously not working so well.

I rely mostly on same-day sales, which are simply luck of the draw and pretty rare.

Anyway. I’m just not sure how much longer I’m going to last. I got to work today only to find one of the sales managers had left a passive aggressive note on one of my records. And I got a super shitty email from some a-hole who inquired about a Camaro and wanted it out the door for $1,000 less than sticker. I explained our no-haggle policy and sent him a similar vehicle for under his desired price. His response, “To much. Bye bye. Never contact me again.”

Wow. Classy. I responded in my head and corrected his misuse of the word “to” and yelled how I was very polite and only emailed him ONCE in response to HIS inquiry. That I did my job and it was very rude and trashy to respond in such a manner to me. (His email was sent at 2:13 AM. Maybe he was drunk. Or high. Or so, that’s what I told myself to make myself feel better.)

It’s incidents such as those two that make it not so fun. I don’t need to put up with the power trip of some sales manager who wants to feel important and mighty. And I really don’t want or need to put up with the rudeness of the general public.

The pros and cons of the job . . .

Pros . . .

1. It’s gotten me out of the house for 15 or so hours a week and gives me something else to focus on that is in no way connected to my marriage or my life before the terrible, horrible, no good, very bad day. Everyone there knows me as a single mom. They don’t know me as S’s wife or who I was professionally before. I’m simply a single mom who needs to get out and work. (Though, people are catching on I’m not selling, thus not making any money, so I have started getting the question of what else I do. They look at me like an alien when I say, “I’m a mom”.)

2. I’ve learned to get outside of my comfort zone. I’m what you would call an outgoing introvert. I’m outspoken and loud and happy and can certainly SEEM extroverted. But, only when I want to be and am in a situation where I am with people I feel comfortable with or when I genuinely want to get to know someone. Making small talk with strangers is torture to me. Like, it physically hurts my eyeballs sometimes. I’ll be trying to make eye contact and focus and listen and all I can think is, “I really don’t want to be talking to this person right now. My eyeballs are on fire. I want to curl up in a ball and take a nap. Right. Now.” And I am often terrible and awkward at small talk with strangers. The worst, really. (Though, it probably feels worse in my head because it takes A LOT of effort for me to keep conversation flowing if I can’t find a connection I can talk about right away.) So, being in sales with the general public has been a huge challenge for me and forced me outside of my box. Can I do it? Sure, and it’s been super good for me to try. But, is it natural and worth forcing in this setting? Not so much. Sssoooo, I guess this is half pro / half con, really.

3. And the best thing that has come from this job? I went from wrecking in almost every parking garage I have ever entered to being able to back-in a Suburban into a tight spot on the first try. I can park any size car, in any spot, like a boss. If that alone is all I took away from this experience, I’d call it a win. AND . . . I can jump a car. I feel pretty bad-ass doing that.

The cons?

Well . . . in addition to the disappointing behavior on the part of some of the staff AND the public itself . . .

1. I just don’t do well punching a time clock. I’ve worked in the corporate setting since college. I haven’t punched a retail time clock since early 2002. Therefore, arriving to work EXACTLY at the very very second I need to can sometimes be hard. And if I clock in a second late, I get a point. After so many points, I’d be terminated. No questions asked. No excuses. I’m either early or I’m late. I’m already half way to being fired. I got a point last week for being, literally, 5 seconds late. Five seconds. I exaggerate you not. Would my manager excuse it for me? Nope. He sure wouldn’t. He told me I should tell my babysitters that I work at 5 PM, no 6 PM, so maybe I’d leave on time. (It’s not the “babysitter’s” fault . . . the only people who watch Charlie are my parents or S and I’m always late because I’m busy talking to them about the baby hand-off and fussing over Charlie. I HATE saying good bye to Charlie when I am going to work. I don’t mind saying good bye if I going to, say, happy hour with girlfriends.

2. The micromanaging. OH MY the micromanaging!!!!!! Managers read my emails. And my phone calls. They listen to my calls with customers. And then we all sit down every other day (or so it feels) and someone tells me what they think of my emails and phone calls. It can get really nit picky and silly and I just want to scream, “I HAVE MY MBA!!! SO sorry I used my brain to formulate this email instead of your canned email template!”

3. I get phone calls and texts and am expected to work even when I’m not AT work. Now, I know that is par for the course with most any job. But, for a part-time job? And when it interrupts the limited stay-at-home time I have with Charlie? No, not okay. Not a good fit.

4. And . . . the biggest bummer of them all? I’m not selling. Anything. So, I’m making pennies. I sold 1.5 cars in January. ONE POINT FIVE CARS. (The half is from splitting a deal with another salesperson who got involved.) My commission paycheck at one point averaged out to 45 cents an hour . . . before it was supplemented to bump me to minimum wage, which I have to pay back out of the next paycheck. I basically should be paying THEM for letting me come to work. I feel my time is worth more than that and would be better spent doing anything else.

Soooo . . .

I guess when it comes down to it . . . I just want to be a mom to my baby right now. That’s all. I want to be a full time mom and not a part time anything. My days as a stay at home mom are limited. I want to cherish them as much as I can, while I can. I will be back to work soon enough. In the meantime, I can use my evenings and weekends during S’s parenting time to do things I enjoy, on my own time, and on my own schedule.

Well, thanks for letting me hash this out, peeps.

I think this experiment is over!

“To much. Bye bye.” 

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