what be the haps?

I decided to wait until the final demise of my “dating interests” before I actually put forth the effort to blog about them. In reading back over the silly blogs I made about other dates, I realize what a waste it is to even spend time thinking and writing about how there could be something there, when 19 times out of 20, there won’t be.

So, about the latest that has come and gone . . .
It was an attempted set-up by a friend of mine, though she thoroughly prefaced the set-up with the fact the guy was not relationship material (fine by me) and more of just a guy who would be really fun to hang out with. She saw us hitting it off and being friends.
In the past month or two, I was introduced and ran into him at a couple parties, chatted here and there, and then he Facebooked me (no friend request, just a message) to ask for my number. That resulted in a month long texting nightmare of trying to coordinate schedules and times to get together, a lot of flakiness and wishy washy on his part, and ultimately, just nothing coming together in the end. (All he could really say to me was, “What be the haps?” which always made me think “No haps, my friend, you haven’t properly asked me out.”) While annoying and frustrating, I went along with the charade for a while, but this past weekend finally decided he was out entirely and I don’t need to play these silly games or be left waiting for a guy who had no desire to pick up the phone and make time for me.
Well, out of the blue, I got a phone call tonight from him (of course it started out, “Was just calling to see what the haps are.” HUH? What does that even MEAN?). He wanted to apologize for always flaking out and went on and on and on how busy his life is (boo hoo? welcome to being an adult?). We had a couple minutes of that kind of awkward conversation, then as the call is wrapping up, and NO mention of a date is even hanging in the air, he adds how he’d love to hang out with me, BUT he can’t commit to a time for at least a few weeks to a month. I LOLed. We all know everything before the “but” is bull shit, right? I could tell he was uncomfortable and I wasn’t in any hurry to save him, so he continued to try and justify it some more and finally said, “that’s all I got.”
I was speechless. I couldn’t believe I was getting a break up call from a guy I didn’t even date and had already written off! I wish I had it in me to have said something really witty or rude in reply to his ridiculous excuses (I still don’t have it in me, it’s so ingrained in me to be kind), but I should have told him not to flatter himself or something and to simply delete my number, he won’t be needing it. Of course, I instead thanked him for his honesty and wished him luck with all he apparently had on his plate and said good bye.
In addition to getting strangely dumped, today was just a weird, weird day overall. Having dealt with all the house drama I ended up an emotional train wreck and had a few emotional calls with John regarding such house stress, which included me wailing about the meaning of life and approaching 30 (welcome to the club, he said) and then me complaining to him how much I loathe girls who pop out babies on purpose with no regard to having a family in tact first (I blame the 16 and Pregnant episode I just watched, which just adds to my sensitivity on the baby topic). Then to cap the day, I got broken up with. When there was nothing to break.
So, those be my haps.
Right now, my absolute favorite movie is He’s Just Not That Into You. One of my favorite quotes from the movie:
“I had this guy leave me a voicemail at work, so I called him at home, and then he emailed me to my BlackBerry, and so I texted to his cell, and now you just have to go around checking all these different portals just to get rejected by seven different technologies. It’s exhausting.”
As absurd as that sounds, it’s not far from the truth. And it IS exhausting. Indeed.


  1. Oh A, I’m so sorry all that ended up being such a mess. I like to think of it as you just dodging a bullet before it got even more complex.



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